Last week after posting about the lack of time to blog, I scrounged around and found some journal entries I could convert into quick posts. I was able to schedule the articles in advance. This is a nice feature of blogging. My goal was to write as the week progressed storing up new posts to publish in advance. It never happened.

The week flew by and my days were full leaving no time to create posts in advance. This week, I am preoccupied on the home front meaning I will not be able to have access to the computer but for short spurts if at all. This morning when I logged onto my computer an error message flashed across the screen. My hard drive is acting up again as well. Technology and I just do not get along well.

Despite the lack of time for writing articles, I continually think of topics worthy of writing about. For example, I am ruminating about how a person discerns the will of God in their personal walk with God. Have you ever noticed that life is not so black and white? Even when you think you are doing the will of God, challenges tend to immediately present themselves. Should we, when we encounter a road block, assume that we are in violation of the will of God?

True there is the letter of the law. However, life doesn’t always fit neatly into those categories. The Bible accounts for circumstances such as these, though many of us ignore the Bible when it comes to the need to walk with the Holy Spirit and step out in faith. We want to walk paths that are clear cut with visible guaranteed results. Perhaps, that is why our society is so reliant upon life insurance, health insurance, sick pay and vacation pay. We want guarantees when we face tribulation in our life.

Sometimes we are pushed to move from the letter of the law to interact with the spirit of the law which requires wisdom and discernment. Recently, I chose a path in my life that required a heavy reliance on prayer, wisdom, and discernment. I anticipated challenges as I made this decision. I knew a few people around me would not agree with the decision I made. There would be some who would rejoice in my choice, but not everyone. So, not only would I face challenges on the path I chose, I would face criticism as well. Many of the paths I travel are not socially popular. I gave up my career, allowed God to plan my family, took up farming and more. Each step I took, I encountered trials, road blocks, and criticism. Please note: Not all people criticized me.  I have found great support.  But, have you ever noticed how loud the critics are making the support seem so muffled.  Satan works like that.

Sometimes well meaning friends and family suggested I was working against or in violation of the will of God. Tough stuff… especially when there are no clear cut scriptures on certain subject matters. Because my fourth pregnancy was not an easy pregnancy and the twin’s lives were threatened, the suggestion was made that I was testing God if I would have any more children.

Walking with God is not easy or black and white. My life is not neat or pristine. I believe many readers can relate to these statements. God requires us to walk by faith not by sight. Sometimes He takes us down paths that will not help us win a popularity contest. However, imagine how desolate the Kingdom of God would be if every time we faced a barrier on a path we concluded it was against God’s will to go down that path. We would accomplish nothing in this life for His glory. Indeed, sometimes our plans are not God’s plans and He thwarts them. However, there are times when what we perceive as a barrier is actually a stepping stone to take us to a higher ground.

How do you discern the will of God in your life?  Have you ever started down a path only to see a debris field?  What did you do? Write in and share what inspired you and how you learned you were in opposition to the will of God.

Once life slows down a bit here, I will write on self-government, autonomy, and the church. Until then…

I remain…

Udderly His,

The Kansas Milkmaid

Opponents of home schooled children state emphatically, “How will they ever learn to function in the real world?”

This misguided assertion perplexes me. Here is why:

My nine year old begged and pleaded to decorate her twin brother’s birthday cake. The twins are ardent supporters of dairy farming. I decided the first cake should be mostly small animals and tractors on a cake lightly decorated with frosting. As Moriah improves her skill she can do more elaborate decorations. The twins scrounged up tractors and small plastic dairy cows to put on their cake. Some time passed. More time passed. Then Moriah called me into the kitchen to survey her work. It was a white frosted cake with green grass, a brown row of frosting simulating freshly plowed farm ground. In the middle of the green grass were piles of brown frosting. “WHAT is THAT supposed to be?”

I shouldn’t have asked.

“Those are cow pies” she replied as a matter of fact.

In the midst of toy dairy cow replicas, my daughter inserted reality, the real world, simulated cow manure.

A few days later, I visited my plain friends to pick up an order of freshly butchered chickens. I promptly roasted one complete with potatoes and carrots. It was oh so delicious. Moriah picked up the thawed bird and said,

“Just think. A few days ago this was a live chicken”. She held the bird up with her small hand thrust inside the body cavity. She wiggled her arm and began clucking like a chicken. As a citified product of a government education, I did not deal well with this reality. I ate a garden salad for supper. The rest of the family ate chicken. I skipped the cake and ate ice cream only. My home schooled children embrace reality with more gusto then my queasy stomach can handle.

So, will home schooled children learn to deal with the real world? Yes, they do live in the real world. There is no need for a reality show in this family.

In all fairness, there are some glitches in home education. My oldest son recently began working with recovering drug addicts. During a recent visit, he informed me that I failed to properly inform him of slang used by those suffering from addictions. Andrew graduated equating getting stoned with Stephen’s death in Acts. He was thankful he never learned the modern cultural meaning of getting stoned. Should I be thankful for this oversight? You tell me.
Udderly His,

The Kansas Milkmaid

Seven years old!!!

The twins celebrated their seventh birthday on July 3rd.  Life with twins is an incredible blessing and adventure.  The twins are identical but they look different enough now that most people can tell them apart.  Josiah and Jordan have never forgotten the dairy and continue to wake up before the alarm saying they are ready to milk cows.  I appreciate their desire to work hard and help around the house.  But, their love of God is the most rewarding.  The twins enjoy reading the bible.  Josiah wakes me first thing in the morning asking me to read the bible to him.  They are also notorious for singing hymns while working, playing, and traveling.  They are a great encouragement to me.  It has been a privilege to raise them for our King.  Join me in praying that these boys would have a life time of faithful and fruitful service to our amazing God.

Udderly His,

The Kansas Milkmaid

Trudging up the hill, I moaned and groaned. “I paid two dollars to walk this path, a tourist trap. I must complete this hill”. It was her hill. Her lane and his lane, Almanzo and Laura Wilder’s lane. If an elderly woman could walk this hill, surely I could walk it too. Course, the elderly woman probably didn’t run four miles in a hilly park prior to walking this lane. No. She was a farm wife, a woman who probably cared little about being American model thin because in her day, American model thin wasn’t in. Doubt invaded my thoughts. Surely, she did not walk this path. She was after all in her sixties, when she lived on this farm. How on earth could a sixty-year old woman walk such a steep hill.

Providence led my elementary school teacher to read her books to us during the school year. I was in the first grade when her novels took me to a place on the prairie, I knew nothing about. Her pen transported me back in time to life on the frontier. It was a place filled with hard work, values, Indians, and tribulation. As a young girl I loved to listen to my teacher read these novels. My home life was filled with the torment that comes with domestic violence and alcoholism. These stories took me far away from those cares. Laura Ingalls Wilder’s “Little House” series made a deep impression on my psyche. Though I would grow up to live most of my life in the city, I longed for a life on the prairie, a life as a pioneer woman.

My career and life heavily immersed in buy now pay later materialism proved unfulfilling. I continued to feel a close and sentimental connection to pioneer. Simply, I felt I was born in the wrong century. In my early thirties, I got my first taste of farm life with the purchase of dairy cows and chickens. Though milking cows proved to be demanding and time consuming, I found my life to be filled with meaning. Operating a farmstead dairy, allowed me to develop skills long lost and forgotten in our society. Committed customers demonstrated that the once dead farm community can be resurrected.

Personal tragedy led me to close our farm seeking a fresh start and a new beginning. My quest for a new beginning meant I encountered closed doors. As some door were closed, new ones were opened. Quite apart from my planning, I found myself in the heart of Amish country. Because my cows were boarding over, until I found my own land, I still needed raw milk. The desire for farm fresh milk gave me the opportunity to form friendships with the plain people who empathized with my plight to live a pioneer lifestyle. Over the last several months, I have made great strides in acquiring appliances and tools that will enable me to live the life I have longed to live.

My visit to the Rocky Ridge Farm in Mansfield, Missouri held special meaning for me. I remembered how her stories kept me captivated as a young girl. I remembered wrestling with the longing to live in the centuries of old. I did not realize that though I was born in this century, I could actively and purposely design my life to be the life I so longed for.

Our tour guide described Laura and Almanzo’s life and times at the Rocky Ridge Farm. As I listened to her recount their biographies, I noticed two meaningful themes. Their daughter, Rose, built a stone house for them completely furnished with modern amenities. Laura and Almanzo lived there for a while, but soon grew tired of the home and returned to their quaint farm house built from a shanty. If offered a life of modern luxury, some refuse it realizing that their life is more without the convenience. It is okay to desire to live life simply even when a life of luxury is given to you as a gift. I have been going in the opposite direction of modern society for twelve years now. At times, I have felt discouraged as I purposely select to live differently. Yet, I feel so much joy and peace even when my life was a debris field. I live this life, because I want to and because I can.

I noted that Laura’s writings began after she retired. She was sixty-five when she began her infamous books. Often times, we see retirement age as a wasted age. God has demonstrated in the lives of others that, perhaps, the most fruitful work can be done much later in life. As a mother of young children who has had continual affirmation that God has gifted me in writing, it is encouraging to know that I can perfect this craft after my children are substantially raised and still make an impact. I don’t have to forsake my role as a mother to enhance my career opportunities. We should never quit exploring gifts and talents we have no matter how insignificant they seem. One never knows what doors God will open. The most important point is to enjoy serving and glorifying God with our talents despite our age and any barriers that we face.  

Just like I wanted to make the most of paying to walk Laura’s path, we should make the most of our own paths in life.  We may find a twist and a turn in some paths.  We may also find an unexpected blessing near the end of a path.

Udderly His,

The Kansas Milkmaid

Enthusiasm and passion are my companions. Whatever I do, yes, I do with all my might. I am a global thinker. That means, I think broadly and live life as an overview. Details, I miss them … frequently.

In this case, I didn’t not miss this detail. When it surfaced from the depths of my mind, I submerged it again hoping to deny its reality. I thought about the extreme and planned for it. Specifically, winter issues bother me less. I purchased a wood stove and plan to cook and heat with wood. Simple enough, right? Okay, I will have to cut and split wood. That is not so simple. But, my children and I have experience using a chainsaw, and hauling wood together.  We can do this…I think. 

But what about the extreme? Heat. Summer. A life with no air conditioner. A life with no air conditioner in a state notorious for humidity. I used a little unit that required 110 power last summer. We used it some but not chronically. I thought I was ready for this year, I intentionally did not buy an air conditioner knowing I was going to live off-the-grid. All was well until mid-June.

Generally, I do not turn on the AC unless temperatures reached the 90’s. However, something happens to me when temperatures reach the 90’s. I have a complete personality transformation and it involves intense doses of irritability, heated irritability no less.

After days of rain, the good Lord decided to dry up the moisture by turning up the heat here in Missouri. The result, was 90 degree weather. I noticed it first in the middle of the morning. I noticed it in the form of a sopping wet clothes from perspiration that never stopped. The children and I soaked wet cloths and lay them over our neck for most of the morning. Later the cloths made no difference and there was no escape from the heat. I found some comfort by laying in front of fan with a wet cloth over my forehead. Generally, the heat made me tired, gave me a headache and rendered me unproductive. By day three, I was a sniveling irritable grouch ready to declare life off the grid as insanity. I mean, why suffer when God gave man the intelligence to create electricity and AC. I was in dire straits and singing a parody to the rock group’s version of “I want my MTV”. (Dire Straits was a rock group in the 80’s).  I changed the words to “I want my electric and AC”.

In a moment of weakness, I drove a good distance to Walmart and picked up a small unit. It was enough to cool two rooms of my home. We installed it with feverish fervency. We plugged it in and pressed the button. Hot air blew out of the unit. Several children gathered around and waited. Hot air continued to blow out of the unit. Several minutes passed. Hot air continued to blow despite threats and complaints about cheap junk manufactured in China. We returned the unit to Walmart and visited several stores in search of another unit. Nothing. The only units we could find would require a substantial loan to make the payments to the electric company. The day waxed on into the evening hours and the temperature dropped into the low 80’s. To get another AC would require a long road trip a substantial distance from home. A quick review of the weather according to internet reports revealed one more day of heat advisory weather. I had made it through three days of weather that felt like 110 degrees. What was one more day? Plus, I found that time in the vehicle provided a great reprieve from the agony but only for the short term. During the last day of the heat advisory weather, the AC went out on the vehicle I am using.

I never returned to get an air conditioner. The humidity is gone. The resulting weather has felt chilly as a result. My plain friends managed to endure the heat, farming and working in it without the aid of an electric fan. We compared notes and concluded that heat like means a person should expect to be less productive. I made it through the heat advisory, but I am nervous about the August weather. Will the low or non-existent electric bill be worth the agony? Tune in during the August months and see.

In the meantime, I welcome any and all tips about how to endure the heat. Wet cloths were helpful. I also learned that running cold water on your wrists is better then running cold water on your head. It shocks the body less.

Udderly His,

The Kansas Milkmaid

Life continues to be hectic here taxing my ability to get on the internet for anything other then returning high priority emails. I anticipate the fast pace to continue until the last week of July.

I appreciate all the emails expressing concern and checking in on us. We are all doing well. The twins turned seven this past week and insist they are grown men. Charity turned five and still asserts she is sixteen. It is a blessing to watch the children grow, but it is bittersweet too.

Andrew will be returning home for a two day visit next week. We are all excited to have him home as we generally travel to see him. He lives so far away that visiting is taxing. The boys are called micro bladders. That should give you an indication of my experience in traveling with five children. It will be good to have Andrew home again.

Last week we welcomed two new Jersey’s into the family. Megan calved in the middle of the heat advisory. She blessed us with Miriam, a beautiful Jersey heifer. Sarah also calved the same day, in the heat advisory, giving us Savannah another Jersey heifer! We have had three bull calves one right after another so it is a true blessing to get some heifers.

I bred three cows a few days before taking them to pasture to run with a bull. Since they moved from our small farm in Kansas to a large Holstein farm in Kansas, they got rather shook up and none of the cows AI’d on the Holstein farm in Kansas settled/became pregnant. The move to Missouri also had them startled. I bred the girls two months in a row with no results. It was disheartening to see such failure. I bred the last three with despair, feeling I had forgotten what I learned in AI class. When I moved the girls to pasture, I expected they would all be bred by the bull. It was a sweet surprise to learn from the dairyman that three of the ladies were showing signs of calving early meaning I successfully bred them. The children and I stopped by the farm last week to see Miriam and Savannah. Indeed, they are full blooded Jersey’s. They look like dwarves compared to their Holstein counterparts. Preparations for farming are still underway. We are thankful for our friends who are caring for our cows while we work through the details of the future farm operation.

I apologize for the rather mundane characteristics of this post, however, I felt it necessary to address my infrequent posting. The inbox is back up to 342 emails with 205 unread and this is the number with the discovery that I am not getting all the emails sent to me.  Technology is so unreliable. 

Surely life will settled down into a more manageable pace soon. In the meantime, take time to enjoy the awesome presence of our God found in every aspect of creation and life. If you follow His command to “Be still” you will find His presence in the tribulation as well.

Udderly His,

The Kansas Milkmaid